I wrote a few years ago a parody about "twas the Nite before Youth Ministry" and revised for ministry and from a preacher perspective ...Here is the Result:
'Twas the Nite Before Ministry,
When all through the church
Not a person was stirring, not even a preacher.
The budget minutes were done for the year with care.
In hopes that funds for the ministry next year would be there.
The church-goers had gone. All full of themselves.
With visions of only thinking of Thyself.
Some people wanted the last say on everything.
And there was alaways that one person that had to be right on every theological thing.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter.
Several of us had sprung out of the church to see what was the matter.
As we entered the church parking lot What did we see?
But Angry people wanted everything for FREE!
More rapid than insults, the crowd made demands.
They had expectations of what they thought ministry looked like and added their demands.
They started to name the Mega Churches by Name by name:
"Now We want to be like Saddleback, Willow Creek and such .... maybe through Joel Osteen and that Henny Guy as such ... so it could put our own preacher to shame ..."
"To the top of the denomination, to the top of the glee of the crowd, we'd rather have glorified ministry and we want it now."
So as the demands of the parents, full of themselves ....
Several others had cried as the silly demands had abound.
Ministry is not a thing dressed up and made good.
It sometimes speaks of sex, drinking and peer pressure other sins to repent of as one should.
It isn't about looking cool.
Or even having a Dodge Viper or Hummer or 2.
Ministry is sometimes about stuff you don't have a clue.
It's about Jesus, church, loving God and others too.
And not another marketing tool.
All of the gimmicks make me want to laugh.
"Teach like Jesus" or get this item for half price and have your church grow without having the Spirit in it at all!
O the marketing - be the next Mega Thing rather than
Be Who God created you to be and not something else.
When will we learn?
When will we turn from this ministry as glorified thing?
Then I knew I had nothing to dread.
Jesus loved me, instead of these angry people instead.
Jesus spoke such kindness and did such a good work.
He gave of Himself, and never was a jerk.
He was born as God's Son.
Loved, died, rose, and is Coming Again!
As I think of Jesus, Ministry and all ....
Its about being the church
And not this programming call.
So the next time someone gives you a complain.
Turn to them and proudly proclaim:
"I serve my Christ offering Him to all;
Love God and others is my Call."
Thus Ministry is a calling and not sort of thing.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.
Parody by Gerrard R. Fess.
Copyright 2011 Permission granted to share everywhere just note the author
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