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Showing posts from October, 2010

Hurting Youthworker Wanted!!

Too often I see that AD. Hurting youthworkers wanted. Apply within so we can hurt you again. I know the old urban legend of its 18mths and the youthworker jets to the next church. I'm wondering though, there are too many hurting youthworkers, too many churches that have fangs. And too few people to say "STOP IT!" My encouragement to the youthworker is hang in there, keep pressing on. The benefits are worth it.

Top 10 Ways Not to Help Hurting Students

Top 10 Ways Not to Help Hurting Students By Gerrard Fess So you are ministering to hurting students, who come in all shapes and sizes bring with them a lot of baggage, stress, and dysfunction. Youth workers, you want to minister effectively to students that are hurting, right? Hereare some suggestions on what NOT to do when a student confides in you. 1. Don’t keep your reactions to yourself; act shocked. The more surprised you look, the more your student willquestion even if he should have confided in you in the first place. Good. You have more important things to do than talk to kids about their problems 2. Don’t use empathy, sympathy, or compassion. In fact, interject your story as soon as possible and say you know exactly how they feel. 3. Don’t listen. Your body language, tone, and eye contact shows your student whether or not you are listening. Glance around, changing the subject, twiddle your thumbs, or even start playing a game on your computer. Anything to commun

You Matter To Your Staff Team

You Matter To Your Staff Team By Gerrard Fess  “Now the body is not made of one part but of many … So that there should be no division in the body, but that its part have equal concern for each other.” 1 Corinthians 12:14,25 NIV. You matter. Your staff, your co-laborers in ministry, needs and wants you to do your very best. You are a part of a body of believers that gets the honor and privilege of working together for the local church. Your ministry and staff position matter to your co-workers. Your actions and conduct reflects on them, and theirs on you. Sometimes it feels like you are working alone; recognize you are not alone. You are in this journey together. Your co-workers want to know your dreams, desires and prayer requests. You are loved and valuable to them. You share life together - meals, family times, joys and trials - not only a calling to ministry. You matter to your staff because you are part of the staff - it takes all of you to accomplish the mission

10 Ways To Start Strong

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10 Ways To Start Strong By Gerrard Fess  You sent in your resume, did the telephone interview, met face-to-face with the search committee, and passed the congregational vote. Now, all you have to do is actually start your job as the new ministry leader. Between unpacking boxes in your new house, trying to remember the names of the church members you've met, and starting a new life, here are a few other things to remember when you start a new ministry: 1. Know what is expected of you by getting your job description in writing. Also, make sure that you have a job contract. You want to be positive, but it could protect both you and the church down the line. 2. An organized office is an office of organized chaos. Being able to actually find your expense report cultivates better relationships with the administrative forces-that-be. 3. Spend time building relationships with the others on staff. Take them out to lunch or invite their family over for dinner. Know their gift

Ten Ways To Resolve Conflict In Your Ministry

Ten Ways To Resolve Conflict In Your Ministry By Gerrard Fess So, you're thinking of quitting youth ministry? You aren't alone. I've been there too. Most people enter into ministry with the assumption that everyone will get along. Those idealistic assumptions last a month or less. Soon enough, all leaders will run into serious conflict. Experience has taught me that most youth workers don't know how to deal with conflict when it happens. They conflict with their Senior pastor, elder board, parents, sponsors, or students and the only resolution that makes sense to them is leaving their post. It is how we view conflict and get it resolved that make us stronger leaders. (Besides using the Matthew 18 principle ) Here are some battle tested strategies for dealing with conflict: 1. Pray. Pray for wisdom, discernment and direction. Pray for the person or people you are struggling with. Seek God first. 2. Rant. Journal privately. Talk to God and/or someone abou

PEOPLE ARE AWESOME.

Top 10 Things To Know when Hiring a Youth Pastor

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10 Things to Know When Hiring a Youth Pastor By Gerrard Fess In the course of my tenure in youth ministry, several churches have asked for my advice in hiring a new youth pastor. This is a great opportunity. By following some of these simple guidelines it is my aim that both the church and the new staff member can develop a great fit that will last for years to come. Top 10 Things To Know when Hiring a Youth Pastor 1. Expectations. What do you expect of him or her? Do we have a firm job description? Do we have a written contract? What's our purpose in hiring this staff member? Is it for shepherding your students, developing programs, or student evangelism? Be as specific in that role as possible. The more you have this in writing the better as the more defined you have this the easier it will be to know when you've found who you are looking for. Have a good profile of the person in mind before you begin interviewing. Do we have the budget to support someone ful

Mike Y. Tribute

I wrote this just days after I meet and heard Mike Yaconelli had passed away. 7yrs ago.: Words cannot express what I'm feeling right now. Abused. Yet joyful. Rethinking yet dangerous. I'm wondering after all the things I've heard if it was true. A zealot, a rebel, a thinker, a dream catcher. A friend. Mentor. One who did not or thought not he was a pastor yet pastored the smallest and slowest growing church in America yet pastored one of the largest as well. He's been called crazy. Mad. Jokester. Stepping out of the water and into the arms of the one who created him. Now wonder they call him unthinkable. I mean afterall, how can God use such a crazy, messy, dangerous person and yet many looked to this one as a mentor. Mentor, peer, and friend. A lover of God. Why is it we like to tell stories of Yaconelli because its his stories that fit us too! He lovingly and ultimately was in love with Jesus. He knew Jesus and was Jesus to many. Why do we love Yaconelli;

A Tip I gave on a YM Site.

“Don’t cut anyone off while driving the church van. The church name and phone number are on the vehicle!” He makes a good point that works in the broader picture as well. Whether we’re thinking about it or not, we’re witnesses to the Lordship of Jesus Christ all the time - even behind the wheel. We never know who’s watching or how that might affect their perception of the Church or her Savior. ----------------------------------------------------- Update though: Found out the alignment and the brake lights and turn signals weren't functioning properly. Currently that van is in the shop. No wonder some people probably felt like I cut them off.

Youth Ministry as a Crutch

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Youth Ministry as a Crutch By Gerrard Fess  Recently I began thinking that there are many churches that view youth ministry as a crutch and not vitally important to the lifeblood of a healthy local church. These churches use, abuse, and misuse the idea of youth ministry mercilessly for their own benefit. So here are some observations that I know churches do which are crutches and not ministry: 1. They see youth ministry purely as a way to grow the church. 2. They see youth ministry as glorified babysitting. 3. In their eyes, more programs and more outings equal more fun, games and more of YMCA director on staff rather than a ministry 4. They get what they pay for. So they pay the youth minister as poorly as possible, support them with little or no budget yet expect the youth group to run like Willow Creek, Saddleback or any other mega church. 5. Viewing vocational youth ministers as a stepping stone so young ministers can become real ministers and get their

Top Youth Ministry Book Recommendations.

Top 10 Youth Ministry Philosophy Books 1. "The Coming Revolution in Youth Ministry And Its Radical Impact on the Church ". Mark Senter III. SP Publications. Inc., (Victor Books) Wheaton, Ill.1992. A good read that looks at where youth ministry has been to where it is headed. 2. "Family Based Youth Ministry ". Mark DeVries. InterVarsity Press, Downers Grove, Ill., 1994. An insightful book of rethinking our youth ministry to focus and include the whole unit of the family. 3. "The Godbearing Life. The Art of SoulTending For Youth Ministry ". Kendra Creasy Dean and Ron Foster. Upper Room Books, Nashville, 1998. A must book for any youthworker. It is seeing youth ministry more than a "To do" list but a pursuit after the heart of God. 4. "Starting Right Thinking Theologically about Youth Ministry ". Edited by Kendra Creasy Dean, Chap Clark, and Dave Rahn. Zondervan, Grand Rapids. 2001. A long overdo academic book on youth mini

10 Reasons Why I'm in Youth Ministry

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10 Reasons Why I'm in Youth Ministry By Gerrard Fess People seem to have looked at youth ministry as "glorified babysitting" or a stepping stone to "Real" ministry. When people ask "Why youth ministry?" I answer, "Why not?" Here is a list of top ten reasons to consider supporting a youth ministry within your church. 1. Not only are youth the church of the future but they are the Church today. It helps to train, equip, and rebuke them in righteousness while helping them know God's Word (2 Timothy 3:16,17). 2. Youth Ministry helps Students to "Go ...." More than ever, young people are willing to be stretched, used, and challenged to step out of their comfort zones. Mission Trips and Service Projects are very important. Trips with your student ministry with groups like YWAM, CIY, Group, and others help students and adults alike to "Go ye into all the world ..." (Matt. 28:19,20). [Discuss in the forums] 3. Yo

10 Things to tell Teens About Sex.

10 Things to Tell Teens About Sex 1. God created sex. And because God created sex; it is good. In fact, He commanded Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply. In other words, have a whole lot of sex! 2. Sex is great…within marriage. It really is! You will never experience true and amazing sex, the way God intended it, outside of marriage. Sex is for marriage. That is what God intended. 3. Sex is not a dirty thing. The world has made God’s awesome and pure gift dirty, but it’s beautiful and good. 4. It is okay to talk about sex. A healthy discussion of sex is a good thing. 5. Sex is everywhere. It is on television, radio, online. We have to be cautious of the things we see and what we view as sex objects. Satan has distorted sex into something dirty and dangerous. 6. Sex education has to start at home. Invite parents to come in and learn how to talk about sex with their teenagers. Have your sex talk with a group of panelists with couples from various stages of life there

Combating Generalizations of Youth Workers

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Youth workers have a bad reputation in church ministry. Recently, I was part of discussion on youth workers physical stereotypes. You've heard them, they must be male, play the guitar, and of course have a goatee. I thought I’d take a few minutes to bring up the generalizations I often hear about youth workers character and work traits. Here are the expressions of angst and some reasons behind the generalizations I often hear for a dislike of youth workers: 1. They come off as knowing it all; they’ve been there and done that. Think tend to they can change the world overnight. 2. They are not patient. They are ignorant of how churches really get things done, yet they want their way right anyway. 3. They are unbalanced and lack personal management skills. Work, but take a day off. Spend time with your family; and yet do what you have do during your office hours. 4. They tend to be disrespectful. If most only knew the many times their senior pastor has put himself in the lin

Helpful Hints For Getting Hired In Youth Ministry

Helpful Hints For Getting Hired In Youth Ministry By Gerrard Fess Let's cut to the chase. You are reading this because you are looking for a job in youth ministry. I have some suggestions to help you go from looking to being happily employed. 1. Your resume is everything. Keep it short. Simple. An opening letter of interest of the position. The resume itself should have your contact info, philosophy of ministry, doctrinal statement, education, experience, honors, and references. Usually 1 page for an introductory letter, 1-2 page resume, and references. Make it professional. Check for spelling. Make them want to talk with you. Don't overdo it though. Be concise and honest. 2. Have it in writing. Get a description of the position. Is it just teens, children also? Pay range etc. If a church doesn't have any idea of what they are looking for, should you really be considering them? 3. Ask what the application process is. This is important. If you are looking for a po

Handling Forced Exit

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By Gerrard Fess  Handling A Forced Exit Sooner or later it seems like everyone in youth ministry has to deal with losing their job. There are times when this is by your choice, there are times when it is mutual, and their are times when you are forced to leave your ministry against your wish. The following is a list of suggestions that you may want to take into consideration if this happens to you. 1. Use Resources (Link to Hurting Resources @ YMX) that are already out there to help with the healing process and get onto the road of recovery. 2. Get as much encouragement as possible. There will be bouts of doubt, depression, anxiety, stress, and knowing where God is - in this time. 3. Get some accountability and counseling advice. 4. Move on, but also cherish the memories. Make a scrapbook, write a resignation letter. Be positive - even if you are not. 5. Get a GOOD recommendation IN WRITING from the former congregation. Sometimes - even if forced exit having this migh

Tom Bosley - Will Always be Mr. C to me.

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I loved Tom Bosley. I was probably one of the few that watched Father Dowling Mysteries. He will be missed.

The Stanley Cup - A Review

So I've been readin Frank Orr's 1976 book The Stanley Cup. Very interesting history of the NHL, the Original 6, and the start of the WHA, and the expansion. Good insight. It brought back some memories and names I've been hearing about through history. It also made the Hall of Fame come more to life to me. (I've been there several times)

New Blog Series Starts

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With the Upcoming Closure of YMExchange.com I'll be posting my articles from there here and also have on my profile on my facebook page from the YouthSpecialties.com site. Thanks.

YMX, Its History, and closure.

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Since about 1996 a version of YMX has existed. At first it was the ole listserv. Started by Mikey of Mikey's Funnies. In 2003 it became the YS Forums After a few years, and YS wanting to do an upgrade to their site ... the forums shut down for awhile in June 2005.(After YAC died in October 2003 the tribute and forums were the busiest) Meanwhile a few of the community started in Dec 2005 YMexchange.com At first I was critical, saw Competition, Disagreed, Cynicalthen became Positive. One of the coolest things about YMXis not only the community but the articles, reviews and the tons of links. In  June of 2008 Youth Specialties had acquired YMX. Several of my articles are featured over at YMX including 2 in the Top 10 features. (How cool is that?) So why do I mention all of this and YMX's history? Today I came across a Master's Thesis based upon some of the YS listserv now YMX in my library. The thesis is "A Community of Legitimacy: How Youth Workers Use

Ten Dumbest Things Christians Do Series Starts

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Our new series based on Mark Atteberry's book is starting. Starting the series is a sermon on Slinging mud at the Bride of Christ. What is the Bride? What is mudslinging? And why we shouldn't do it.

See You Tomorrow.

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So I got in the habit of telling one of my friends, "See You Tomorrow." Finally, my friend asked me "What does that mean?" (Is there a joke?) My reply: "No joke. Just I'll see you tomorrow whether here, there or in the air. Lord willing." We're not always guaranteed today; but when THAT "Tomorrow" comes; we shall be reunited with HIM.  No matter what happens; we're going to Praise HIM. Praise the Lord in all things. 2 Peter 3: 8-14 reminds us of this. We get to look forward to a new earth and a new  heaven, the home of righteousness. 1 Thess. 5: 10 says "He died for us so that, whether we wake or asleep, we may live together with him." My friend's health isn't great. I don't know what the future holds for my friend,(Nor for me) but I do know WHO holds the future. And until then, I'm going to continue to tell her "I'll see you tomorrow." We serve a GREAT God. Tomorrow offers Hope, fait

12 Seconds to Close

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So 12 Seconds is closing. What is it? A youtube type uploading place for 12 seconds you said something. I was experimenting in video and vlog with it and even got to promote our Youth Ministry position with it. I'll miss you 12 seconds.

The Holiday Debate.

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Every year it comes and goes. Xmas Versus Christmas. Easter Versus Resurrection Lord's Day. The Evils of Halloween. So what is a Christian to do? What is the Church's position? And how are we, as Christians, to act? Here is the Big Deal in a nutshell: Basically it is "Christians majoring in minors." So what people call it XMAS or Holidays rather than "Christmas." Are we so surprised that sinners do what sinners do? The bigger question is how are you promoting Jesus everyday? Not just on Sundays or Holidays to suit your traditions. So what that some holidays have their roots in evil? Shouldn't we redeem them, and make things Christ-like? Colossians 2:16 says "Therefore do not let anyone judge you by what you eat or drink, or with regard to a religious festival, a New Moon celebration, or a Sabbath day." Seems I don't see too many New Moon holidays (unless you count that book/ movie series). So what is one to do? Well Phil.

Be Wise on Giving

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This Sunday concludes our series in 1 Corinthians and being wise on Giving - our talents, treasure, and time. Hope to see you there.

Ten Ways to Show Your Pastor Some Love!

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Ten Ways to Show Your Pastor Some Love! By Gerrard R. Fess October is Pastor or Clergy Appreciation Month. The following are some suggestions to help show your leadership that you care. As a fellow pastor some of these suggestions were given to me and helped encourage and show that I was valued as a member of the church body. 1. Gift cards Cards from a local grocery store, home value places, blockbuster, i-tunes etc. can be great gifts. Be creative. I got one from one of our families just to say "Thank you" for a local Ice Cream place - and plan on taking my family. 2. Groceries Get what their grocery list is or what they usually buy. Some churches in the South I'm told do what is called a "Pounding" and basically what a pounding is a challenge to fill the cupboards and fridge to the brim with stocks of food. Imagine saving $$$ on groceries. Very practical idea. 3. A Night Out Free babysitting and complimentary funds for a date night. 4. Money Som

Top Youth Ministry Blogs - Yours Truly is One!

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Found Here Online Masters Degrees

October is Minister Appreciation Month.

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Here is an article I wrote and published by Higher Ministries .... that can get you some ideas. Article Here is an Article Explaining What it is about

Leadership lessons, facebook and more links.

Leadership Lessons HT to Doug R. Is Facebook Killing our Souls? Why Social Media is good for us? Crave Documentary

Look and Feel Canadian.

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Too Funny. Thanks to Mike K for pointing this out. Now everyone can look and feel Canadian - just like me.

MACU School shooting. Please pray!